Seeing the future is overrated
In August of last year, 3 weeks after A died, I wrote a post about my favorite guitarist. He loves a beautiful young woman, and I worried for them. I was a young woman who loved a fifty-something guitarist, too; it didn’t work out so well for us. Since that post, I’ve seen them together twice, once at the tribute concert I attended with A’s family and friends last February, and again that same month on a cruise E and I took to Mexico because Tommy Emmanuel was the featured musician. They looked happy together. They always remind me of A and me; we were always happy together, too.
I am on the mailing list for Tommy fans, and a few weeks ago we began receiving notices of canceled concerts. This was unusual in and of itself, as the man typically tours 300 days a year or so. The last one finally said that he was taking time off to address some health issues that he’d put off too long. I was concerned, as I imagine a lot of people were, but in the absence of information, I just kept a good thought for him and hoped it wasn’t a return to addiction issues that once plagued him. It seemed unlikely, but one never knows.
Today, I got word via the same mailing list that there was a video message from the man himself at YouTube, so I went to watch it. If you watch it, you will find out that his “health issue” is a heart condition. And when I learned that, my own heart sank and my stomach started flipping. It brought it all back to me…not that it’s ever very far away. I was 34 when A died; all I could think was "This can’t be my life. I’m just a kid!" I still think that, only I know better.
He says he’s doing well, and looking forward to getting back on the road, but he looks thin and tired, and every one of his 52 years, and then some. I shook his hand in February, and he looked a lot stronger. I do hope I am wrong, for both his and his beloved’s sake. But I have never been lucky enough to be wrong when I really, really wanted to be. However, I’d just as soon they be spared this separation; I’d just as soon we’d all been spared.