Love is forever…One woman’s journey with grief

And the days insist on continuing,
oneintothenextintothenext.
I can’t keep up, but I want to be old,
like you,
So I let them pass with my tacit approval.
Sly am I
to pretend to live
as I celebrate each passing day
as one more step towards the end.

I tell myself that this is just where I am at,
and that maybe it won’t always be this way
maybe I won’t always be this way.

But I don’t know;

"always" is hard to believe in these days
"forever" might be the time it takes a jar of mayonnaise
to turn
or sixty years
or somewhere in between

It is the amount of time since you stopped talking
to me

As always, I talk through your silences
keeping up your end of the conversation
by not letting you get a word in;
not that you’ve been trying to speak.
I haven’t even heard you clear your throat.

Perhaps you’ll tell me later.  But
I can’t stop chattering;
I cannot bear your silence.